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Saturday, 6 April 2013

The web stalker...

Firstly let me explain - in order to promote my Granny Smith series I created an online presence for Granny, treating it as if she were a real person. You see when you read about Granny's website and Facebook page in the novels you can actually visit these pages - I maintain Granny's Facebook page as if I were Granny Smith.


Nice to know that this old bird's still got it - on the Granny Smith Facebook page HERE - I have picked up my first stalker who claims he wants to know more about me, but I suspect he just wants to get into my bloomers. Hey, there's plenty of cool  tunes played on an old fiddle.

Below is the transcript of an instant chat this net romeo initiated with my this morning:

Hello angel how you doing am DON MOORE from new york am single seeking for true love here, what about you can i know more about you
You could buy my book, sweetchunks XX
I want to know more about you honey
Hi! What's up?
Hi! What's up?
nowt just soaking my teeth and using a hacksaw to file my toenails.
how pain it is honey?
You are my first Internet crush - congratulations
how you doing now?
I'm fine - gonna make lava bread for dinner and then grease my breasts
where do you live honey?
In a small village called Gilfach - I like long walks, listening to rock music and solving murders
what country is that honey?
The UK my sexy American dude - from now on I will think of you as my own Charles Bronson
we you marry me?
My Arthur may have something to say about that. Mind you he has a bad ticker and should only be around for a few more years...five at the top!
can,t yyou marry me?
It'll be bigumtree
never mind read one of my books and bang one off the wrist
am heree because of love, am not here because of book

1 comment:

Oscar said...

Leave it to Granny to solve problems like this as well as murders, etc.