I must admit to being disappointed when it was recently announced the Sam Mendes will not direct the next Bond movie - after all Skyfall was a damn fine Bond movie, even if I'm still not totally sold on Daniel Craig in the role of 007. Still Skyfall displayed an understanding of the franchise and was a better Bond movie than either of Craig's other two efforts. Yeah, I know many people think Daniel Craig's first stab at the role in Casino Royale was a triumph but I am not one of those. Still the latest unconfirmed rumours are even more of a worry, and Guy Ritchie is being touted as the director of the next Bond movie. Daniel Craig's Bond is already too blokey and Ritchie's already given us a blokey Sherlock Holmes, both of which have been successful which fucking baffles me. Guy Ritchie's Sherlock Holmes is nothing like Sherlock Holmes and Daniel Craig's Bond is already too Bondlite so the combination of Craig and Ritchie is not something I'd savour.
The news is that the next Bond will be called Brown Bread Forever, Brown Bread being cockney rhyming slang for dead, and that Bond will face a deadly criminal organization. The Archive can reveal that Leslie Grantham has been approached to play the lead baddie who manages the Five Finger Shuffle nightclub, which is in reality a front for the criminal empire that stretches from Walford to the Isle of Dogs. The film will be made at various exotic locations including Brighton, the Costa Del Crime and a Scrapyard in London's East End.
Never mind here's a pic from a time when James Bond was still suave and sophisticated rather than rough and ready....and we still have the older, far superior, Bond movies to fall back on.