Tuesday 8 June 2010

YOU KNOW YOU'RE A WRITER WHEN...

Writer's News have published a list of pointers that identify you as a writer. Taking this has a starting point the Archive decides to have some fun with this. And so -

You know you're a writer when:

Your default template in Word in double spaced Times Roman 12pt

Credit Card companies reject you because you don't have a set annual income.

Whilst reading novels you find yourself thinking, 'too much tell and not enough show.'

You find yourself using words like procrastination in everyday conversation.

You have a drawer for pens, many of them stolen

Your TBR pile is reaching for the ceiling.

Whilst editing you curse your editor.

You've got furrows in your skull caused by constantly scratching in contemplation.

99% of the time you talk complete and utter bollocks

You have multiple files with the same name - doc.txt, edit(55)

You're constantly inventing new words

and new genres.

You've stared at the screen for hours without writing anything and then switched to the Internet to waste a few more hours.

You haven't seen your family for days even though they're only in the next room.

You Google your own name at least twice a week.

You know what an unsolicited submission is.

You think the big publishing houses are run by Dr. Evil.

And the biggest indication of all - you found yourself smiling and nodding at most of these points above.

3 comments:

John Sinclair said...

hahahaha!
brilliant!

Jo Walpole said...

Here's another back at you:

20 Things Only a Fellow Writer Could Possibly Understand

by Sheri Radford

1 The concept of a good rejection letter.

2 The contradictory emotions of envy and elation experienced when a friend gets "the call" from a publisher.

3 How you can still believe a piece of writing is good, even after it's been rejected 46 times.

4 The truth of the following equation: butt + chair + time = writing.

5 How much a form rejection letter hurts.

6 Wanting honest feedback of your writing, but wanting that honest feedback to be, "It's perfect! Don't change a word."

7 Ideas are everywhere.

8 Ideas are the easy part - it's what you do with all those ideas that's bloody difficult.

9 Writing is really, really, really hard work - even when it looks like you're just goofing off.

10 Staring out the window for an hour is part of the writing process.

11 Sometimes characters refuse to behave and insist on telling a story their way.

12 Everything is fodder for writing even the juicy secret you're sworn to secrecy about.

13 The inner critic is harsher than any outer critic could ever be.

14 Sometimes scrubbing the toilet or cleaning the garage is more appealing that writing.

15 Sometimes writing is more appealing than getting enough sleep or going out on the town.

16 A first novel shooting straight to the top of the New York Times
bestseller list is just an urban myth. (It has to be, it just has to be, doesn't it?)

17 Procrastination is a crucial component of the writing process.

18 Sometimes bookshelves need to be rearranged, right now.

19 Having written is far more fun than writing.

20 There's always more rewriting to be done.

Jo Walpole said...

BTW, I don't agree with a lot of these but they're fun. :-)

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