True Crime Madness

The following are all documented real life cases, which just shows that we really do live in a mad mad world. These stories were collected from the world wide web by someone who really should be doing something more productive.

The Bog Blocker - Police in Sheboygan, Wisconsin, appealed to the public for help in late March tracking down a most unusual perpetrator. "Over the past year and a half," the department posted on its Facebook page, "someone has been clogging the women's toilet (at the Deland Community Center) with a 20-ounce soda bottle. This is very strange ... and gross." The Sheboygan Press reported that the string of more than 25 incidents began in 2016. Joe Kerlin, the city's parks and forestry superintendent, says the suspect is likely an adult male, based on security camera footage from outside the restroom. The city's resulting plumbing bills have totaled between $2,000 and $3,000.



The Idiotic Thief - Ruan Rocha da Silva, 18, was caught in late March trying to steal five cans of deodorant from a supermarket in Sao Paulo, Brazil. His prominent tattoo might have given him away: A year ago, after Silva tried to steal a bike from Maycon Wesley Carvalho, 27, and Ronildo Moreira de Araujo, 29, the two men forcibly tattooed Silva's forehead with the words "I am a thief and an idiot." The Daily Mail reported that Carvalho and Araujo were caught after filming themselves inking Silva's forehead and sending the video to friends; both were sentenced to jail time. Silva is out on bail, awaiting trial for shoplifting.


The Drunk Driver - It was lucky 13 for Hot Springs, Arkansas, resident Patricia Ann Clanton, 55, as she was charged with her 13th felony DWI on March 26. Garland County Sheriff's Deputy Richard Garrett stopped to check on a Chevrolet Monte Carlo parked in the lot of Buddy Bean Lumber Co. around 1 a.m. on March 26, reported the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette. An assisting officer noticed a strong smell of intoxicants and asked Clanton and her passenger to get out of the car. Clanton refused a field sobriety test but agreed to a Breathalyzer, which registered her blood alcohol level at more than twice the legal limit. Nevertheless, she entered an innocent plea in Garland County District Court. Since 1994, Clanton has been convicted of driving drunk in various Arkansas jurisdictions and served jail time.

Dickface - When police in Largo, Florida, arrested Jeffrey Forrest Poole on charges of violently resisting a police officer, the authorities made sure to list things like his age, weight and address in his arrest report.Officers also included an alias that Poole has allegedly used in the past ― and it’s pretty awesome. The Alias was Dickface Johnson.

The Parrot knows - An African gray parrot known for its very filthy mouth may be a key witness to the killing of his owner.The parrot, named Bud, belonged to Martin Duram until May 2015, when a killer shot Duram to death in his home in Ensley Township, Michigan. Duram's wife, Glenna, sustained a shotgun wound to her head in the attack, WOOD-TV reported at the time.Michigan State Police investigators initially suspected an intruder. But they now list Glenna Duram, who has since recovered from her injuries, as a suspect.

 Police records obtained by WOOD-TV allege that Duram shot her husband five times with a gun that belonged to the family, then turned the weapon on herself. The couple reportedly had been having financial problems.Glenna Duram, who authorities said left three suicide notes, denied killing her husband when detectives interviewed her after she recovered.

Her in-laws, however, finger Duram as the killer and say the parrot can prove her guilt.
A few weeks after their son was murdered, Lillian and Charles Duram took a video of Bud repeating what sounds like an argument, complete with changing voices.At one point, Bud says, “Don’t f***ing shoot.”

Police records show an unidentified person asked a detective whether Bud could be used as evidence, but there is no mention of whether the detective responded. Newaygo County Prosecutor Robert Springstead told WOOD-TV that he’s aware the couple had a bird that talked, but hadn't seen the video of Bud's performance. He said he'll decide whether to file charges in two or three weeks, after Michigan State Police finish their investigation.

At least one parrot aficionado said it's entirely possible Bud is vocally recreating what he witnessed. Samuel Carr, a parrot buff in San Diego, California, said African gray parrots are very intelligent and can learn to mimic phrases quickly if there's a reason.